Party Night

Well last night was Maria's Trailer trash Birthday Party! As you can see Davie and I really worked on the trashy part! We had a good time - then went and had breakfast with Bear at Jims - liver and onions! Here is bear sleeping on my couch!
He had been up 24 hours at that point! He was so pissed I took a picture - he knows if you fall asleep around me I take pictures! What did he expect?

So I'm still sick and plan to go back to bed now to nap til i have to go to work - but first.
Movie quote - last one was from Lilo and Stitch - Tana come on with those kids you didn't know that!
So for today:
"Dishes are done dude"
Tana I just told yo this one a couple days ago - go watch the movie!

I am a sane, rational, normal person

Well maybe some days I am, I think I am but don't they say the insane don't know they are insane. How scary is that! You could go your life thinking your in control, sane and never realize your as nutty as a fruit cake! Which when you think about it is a very odd statement - fruit cakes are full of fruit - shouldn't it be as fruity as a fruit cake?
On to other thoughts! I am much better about the whole Kevin thing, some days things just don't work out, and you just have to pick up and go on! I'm okay with that!

Random thought - i think I'll start leaving movie quotes - leave me a comment if you can name the movie! For today
"Her head is kinda loopsided, so i pretent she has worms in it"


I was up way earlier then i normally am - due to a nap at 5am, so I'm off to bed!

Update

So I am much calmer today. Spent some time with friends last night - had a good time, and was able to put things in perspective. I was also able to get some work done on the baby kimono for baby Mathew, so I am in a much better place. I thought through a few things and made a few decisions and am okay with whatever happens in my life in the next few weeks. Whatever happens may still upset and piss me off but that is okay - I have decided I like the ups and downs, it makes life very interesting! Makes me more aware of myself and what is happening around me. So I am off to bed! Had a nap at 3 am so was still wide awake when i normally sleep.

WELL.......

WARNING!!!!!!! This post is going to be explosive and have very nasty words!!!!

Finally talked to Kevin tonight - he got back on saturday afternoon, we chatted, he said he would call me back either tonight or tomorrow. Had a good conversation. Then I found out from other sources - you ready for this? -
HE BROUGHT HIS WIFE BACK AND DIDN'T SAY A FUCKING WORD!!!!!!!
Now I'm not upset he brought her back - if they can work things out I would be thrilled for him and his family - however BE A FUCKING MAN AND TELL ME ABOUT HER!!!! Don't hide what is going on in your life - makes me feel like the other woman and I am NEVER the OTHER WOMAN!!!! I have to much respect for myself and whoever I am with to be in that situation! I have listened and not said a word when friends were worried about me talking and hanging out with him, I have said we were open with each other about being friends and him not being in a place for a relationship - I'm fine with that - if I'm moving to Va then I am not in a place for that anyway - but I don't like that he is hiding this from me!!!

I have decided to not say a word that I know and see how long it takes him to tell me himself. As long as others don't tell him I know, it may be awhile! Should be interesting!

I guess I didn't have alot to say!

Was just too tired this am to think straight! After I started typing I couldn't get my thoughts together and was just too tired to decide what to say. I have had alot happen in the last week, so much so that the days have run together and I feel like last week was a month ago. Between hanging out with John in the middle of the night, working 9 overnights at work, knitting, and talking to friends - plus trying to remember to eat(which really is harder then you would think - I ended up with the shakes at work the other night and David(a regular) went and got me food he was so worried about me) I seem to have a hard time eating in them in the middle of the night, and cooking in the heat of the day makes me feel like throwing up. So I end up just eating once a night or snacking on a piece of pound cake at work or something - which is really bad for me.
I have also had a hard time sleeping with the heat so bad during the day - wake up covered in sweat and feeling icky.
I haven't heard from Kevin in a week - since he left for OK - he was supost to be back on saturday or sunday - so I may be just getting blown off, or he could be just really busy - whatever, I'm to tired and out of it to care at the moment.
I am trying to not text him too much or call - just get bored in the middle of the night and know he is one of the few people up at the hours I am.
I have the habit of sending random text messages in the middle of the night - just send off a large group to see who responds! Such a bad habit to get into!
Well i need to get a nap before work.

The Yarn Harlot

Stephanie Pearl-McFee & Sunshine Sallygayle

I have alot to say

It's an M & M - i know I didn't see it either!
So lots to say - first off went to see the Yarn Harlot a couple weeks ago and never posted the picture so here is that - was a very eventful day - just thinking about it makes me want a nap! Oh well never mind I can't remember how to resize the pictures. On to other things - I am sort of seeing a new guy - we hang out from time to time. His name is John - he's 20 - which mom thought was funny. He works 2 jobs and goes to school, so he doesn't have alot of time. He is a HUGH flirt and it makes me laugh - for those wanting to know what he looks like here is a really bad picture taken on my phone at 2 am in the dark the other night. He was not pleased i was taking pictures - he had been up since 7:30 the morning before and was very tired. Still cute though.
What else - I worked 9 of the last 10 nights and am now dead! But am doing better after not having to go in tonight!
Am half way through the baby kimono from the mason dixon knitting book for Lyndsay's baby due like next week. Pretty good for one day's work - especially for me I am a very slow knitter.
I think I'm going to take a nap!

What in the world is this?

Yes I am alive!

Yes I am alive. I have just been working the overnight 9 of the last 10 nights at work and too tired to do anything but go to work and come home and sleep. I did manage to finish two dishclothes yesterday morning when I got off work, before I went to sleep. The frog and the mystery KAL dishcloth from my Lone star state knitters group - one of the ladies designed it - she was bored, she's pregnant with her 5th and bored. Tell me if you can figure out what it is. Blogger is being difficult I'll load the picture later. Bye for now

It's time for bed

It's past time for me to go to bed - i'm alittle punch drunk with lack of sleep. But I realized earlier that for the first time in awhile I am really pretty okay with my life - I'm not doing anything important, I'm even having money problems from time to time - but i don't care. I am happy with who i am and what I'm doing! Work is pretty easy, I have a guy I enjoy spending time with, I'm knitting again. Right now I have 3 dishcloths, a rabbit, and a lace shawl on needles, and am making progress on all. I have plans with friends, I have people I can count on, and life is nice - I am so tempting fate by saying that! But that's okay! I may have car problems, and money problems but who cares! LIFE IS GOOD! All in all I couldn't really ask for much more - well I could but that would really tempt fate! I'm in a great mood and am going to bed! I am off to Hobby Lobby - where peaches and cream is .99 cents this week! And to bath and body works because i have a COUPON!!!!! More later

A long night.....

I had a very long night at work, and am glad to be home for some sleep! Every day makes me more aware of different parts of my life. Lately it's been my lack of knowledge when it comes to men - I have decided they really are a separate species with no relation at all to females. Their behavior makes no sense to my female mind and you can never read anything into their actions - you'll always be wrong. I have made the last 2 weeks a study of the species and come to a couple conclusions to help me in my daily life - one - always take them at face value - do not read anything into what they say or do, they really are that one dimensional. Two - they have a very odd relationship with the phone - where they can't return phone calls, and in equal parts hate and love their phone - they are never without it but they rarely answer it. So give up trying to reach them and expecting a response. Three - they rarely remember they are supposed to do something, or that they made plans to do something - everything is a complete surprise to them - it doesn't matter how many times you told them about it - they will not remember it! Four - they really don't listen - they have learned to respond based on the tone of your voice not what your saying, so don't expect them to remember you telling them anything - relates well to number three. Five - they will do anything to avoid an adult conversation about their feelings and/or your feelings, do not think even locking them in a room or in a car will work they will find a way out!

So to save your hair - you will feel the need to pull it out - remember these things, take a deep breath, and knit with clenched teeth til the urge to strangle, decapitate, or disembowel has passed and you'll be fine, knitting really is very therapeutic - just stay away from the male in your life when working with straights - they are excellent for stabbing, and will sink easily into a chest cavity.

In Addition..

to yesterday's post. I tried to post this yesterday since everyone has been bugging me about a picture to go along with the name. But blogger wouldn't let me upload any pictures. Everyone wants to know what Kevin looks like. This is a really bad picture, since he hates having his picture taken i had to sneak it while he wasn't paying attention. As far as i'm concerned it's what he deserves for not paying attention to me! It was 3am so he looks tired.

Night and Day interchange and the world moves too fast...

So I had 3 whole days off and am getting ready to head out to work now, but for last few days I have had a wonderful time and night and day seem to change into each other and back again! I had been upset with Kevin, then(see previous post) had come to terms with everything. I had been on a much more even keel, happy with everything and enjoying his company. I make it sound like that has chaged - it hasn't. i had a great time last night - we drove up to lockheart and repoed a eclipse - that had a blown head gasket - then over to shiner and picked up a F150 - that was only 2 years old but smelled like something had died in it! Looked for 2 other cars in gonzales with no luck then headed home with me driving the smelly truck and him towing the eclipse. Droped the cars off about 5:30 this am and headed across town to repo a mustang with a good bit of body damage, before he dropped me off at home at 7:30 this am. The drive all over was nice we had a good time laughing and joking, and had a few real conversations about relationships and what was going on in both our lives. He is flying up tuesday to OK to get his stuff and see his kids, he finally got to move in to the house he is renting up the road - real nice 3 bedroom 2 bath with a big back yard with grape vines. Just a fun time. i had made a few decisions, one that I was the one making all the effort to contact him and that that was going to stop - well since I stoped contacting him - he started calling at least 2x a day. Very interesting! We will see how things go.

When Hell is cool and comfortable...

So life has been odd - the heat here really does make hell feel comfortable - along with that I have been at odds with not only myself but Kevin as well. It was in the middle of the night that I realized what I was expecting and what I was wanting, and getting were always going to be three very separate things, and that while I did deserve some consideration, I had to look at the other person and realize HE'S MALE!!!!!!! I was never going to understand, or get him to realize what he was doing that was upsetting me. It wasn't anything big - more a matter of NOT ANSWERING HIS PHONE!!! But at the same time it's not just me he doesn't answer the phone for - or return calls to - it's EVERYONE - the man has serious phone issues. So I feel better - at the same time realizing that what I was expecting from him was for him to change and men never change. I have to decide if what I expect and want and what I have, will mix or if I need to re-evaluate what I want and expect, because what I have will not change. If what I have is not what I need then that is something totally different.

Look at me all philosophical at this time of day!(it's the middle of my night!)
I have had alot of people tell me to drop him, he's not worth the trouble, why would you continue to talk to someone who doesn't put you first, bla, bla, bla. WAIT A MINUTE - I never asked for a serious relationship from him, we have never talked about being more then friends and seeing how things go - so I can't really expect him to treat me like a serious relationship, or any way other then a friend - and by the same count I can't do anything more then treat him like a friend - and I have friends that take weeks to return a call! I just have to figure out if I can live with this.
Time will tell.